Finding Balance: How Ashtanga Yoga Can Support Your Sobriety
Photo: Ana Donega
Today marks 3 years of sobriety for me. It didn’t come easily - but nothing that actually changes us does.
This is part of my background story, and as uncomfortable as it is to be this vulnerable, if it resonates with even one person and encourages you to empower yourself and take back control of your life - it will be worthwhile for me.
TW: Sexual Abuse
When I was a young girl, for years I was sexually abused by a family member. It wasn’t until I was about 14 that I finally gained the courage to tell a friend about what was happening. In our small town, it came out publically that her father was charged with sexual abuse, so I felt comfortable opening up to her about it. She introduced me to alcohol and cigarettes, saying that it would help make it easier to cope. And it did - it numbed everything. For the first time in a long time, everything felt okay again. For a short time of course, and then the memories, embarrassment and emotions all came back, even worse than before. And, that was the beginning of a long cycle…
What I didn’t realize until I became sober, was that this was forming a deep-seeded pattern of substance abuse that would take me until I was 35 years old. Every time I felt anxious, stressed, or even the least bit emotional, I would numb it with alcohol and cigarettes.
In my late 20’s I heard about how yoga, and Ashtanga in particular, has helped so many people to get sober. And after years of practicing, I remember thinking - dear God, why isn’t this working for me?! I was doing all of it. Practicing at the crack of dawn, 6 times a week without fail - doing all of second series and the first half of third in the morning, and still drinking and smoking weekly (sometimes nightly!).
Eventually, it caught up with me and came to a point where I had no choice but to make a change. As disciplined (and stubborn!) as I am, I could no longer drink/smoke and also go deeper into my practice..
Previously, I tried many times to stop and would always throw in the towel after about 30 days. And, honestly, this last time started out no differently. After yet another bender I decided to stop for another 30 days. This time I actually made it to around day 60 when the pandemic hit. At this point I was basically stuck inside my house in the middle of Canadian winter and thought - drinking here alone would probably be a really bad idea. So, I decided to stick with it for another month, and then another.
After a few months I felt so much better mentally, physically and emotionally that I kept going with it. That’s not to say that there weren’t days that I questioned if I should continue - of course I did. But everyday I wake up thankful that I continue to choose this path. I’ve put together a short list of a few things that were paramount in helping me to get and stay sober, day after day.
The 5 things I did that made getting and staying sober a lot easier
1. Changed my practice schedule
Why this worked:
I switched back to the “old schedule” which meant taking Saturday off and practicing on Sunday morning. This was helpful because it held me accountable to not doing stupid things on Saturday night since I’d have to wake up early on Sunday.
2. Made myself busy after dinner
Why this worked:
The evenings were always the hardest for me so I started filling my evenings with other more healthy habits and hobbies. I started painting, would do extra training with my dog, do my meal prep and sometimes I’d just go to bed super early.
3. Laser Acupuncture
Why this worked:
This is done with a painless cold light laser and it’s a holistic treatment that stimulates endorphins which replace the physical need for substances while you detoxify, thereby almost entirely eliminating cravings. It has one of the highest success rates for a cessation program and it made a really big difference for me.
4. Let go of some friendships (mostly temporarily)
Why this worked:
I think we all have those friends who we hang out with or call to have someone to drink with. For me I had to distance myself from them for some time knowing that it would be almost impossible for me to be around them and stay committed to my sobriety. I got super comfortable alone, and later found myself surrounded by amazing sober people. What you are, you really do attract. And, I’ll also mention that after a few months I was totally fine to be around drinkers again.
5. Downloaded the “I Am Sober” app
Why this worked:
I love this app! It not only tracks your sober streak, but also how much money you’ve saved and how many hours you’ve saved yourself from drinking and being hungover. I also love a page on IG @hellosundaymorning
What an awesome mantra/motto! I remember the first few months waking up every single day - and especially Sundays - thinking holy shit, this feels really good to not have a headache or be super dehydrated.
Okay - I’ll leave you with a few last thoughts.
After being sober for a while, I was having people come up to me and comment on how much my practice had progressed in such a short time, even during the pandemic. You know what my first thought was? Getting sober would surely help me with endurance in my practice.
But, later I realized, no - it wasn't getting sober that changed my practice (or many other aspects of my life). It was not being sober before that was holding me - and so many of us - back from our true potential. Let that sink in…
Science backed research has shown that there are no positive effects to drinking any amount of alcohol - even in low to moderate amount. There’s an excellent podcast on the Huberman Lab about this which I highly recommend listening to.
What alcohol does to your body, brain and health.
Okay, here’s the final question, and one I wish someone had asked me years ago..
Do you have a problem with alcohol (or x substance)?
If the answer is no - can you stop for 90 days?
If that answer is also no - I’m sorry to say, it has control over you not the other way around.
If my story sounds in any way like yours - I want you to know that its very, very common. Though I’m of course pretty biased, I do strongly recommend the Ashtanga practice as it will be an invaluable tool in the healing process - but remember - it does take time. Though trauma and addiction can leave us feeling powerless and ashamed, practicing Ashtanga yoga has helped me to rebuild my own strength and self-worth and I know it can do the same for you and/or your loved ones.
If you have any questions about getting sober, I’d love to help you in any way I can. I’m no expert, but I’m more than willing to be open and truthful about the process of what has worked (and not worked) for me.
With all my love,
Kat xo
